It’s okay to be abusive because…

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Art by Sherrie Thai of Shaireproductions.com

Finally, musician R. Kelly is being indicted on sexual abuse charges after decades of allegations and a Lifetime documentary of his horrendous deeds to women and underage girls.  Because of his fame, it is my opinion that his horrific behavior was copied by weak-minded individuals to the further corruption of the music business.

 

I support the women who are having the courage to speak out about abuse instead of sweeping it under the rug.

Silence is sometimes a condition for survival but survival is not thriving and only prolongs the cycle of abuse. The heartache from verbal or physical abuse can build-up in the victim causing emotional, mental and physical health problems. It can make a person feel invisible, not safe, and diminished of self-esteem. If the abuse is given by someone who is loved, then the heartbreak can be soul-wrenching.

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♥ Someone dear to my heart was raped by two guys, but she never came forth because no one wants to identify with the abused, especially if the abusers have put on a good facade to the world. Because the victim knew it was her word against theirs, this precious soul thought it was best to put it out of her mind and try to go on with life.

I am a witness to how this tragic violation took a toll on her future including her mental and physical health, even taking part of her voice.

 

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Alone in abuse

 

Abusers hide behind closed doors, families, organizations and their celebrity. Abusive attacks are sometimes subtle and sometimes escalate in violence. Most times, these acts are protected by excuses made for and by the abuser.

 

It’s okay to be abusive because…

You made me do it…

I can get away with it…

I am more powerful than you…

I am richer than you…

Everyone loves me…

That’s just the way he/she is…

That’s just the way I was brought up…

They will never believe you…

Take it for the team…

It’s your fault…

It’s nothing…

I’m having a bad day…

I was abused in my past…

I am stressed…

I can’t help it…

I need to feel in control…

You shouldn’t look that way…

You had it coming…

You are wrong…

You’re a nobody…

I’m a somebody…

You owe me…

You aren’t perfect…

You are worthless…

You disturb me…

You don’t understand me and I won’t let you in…

I know you are trying to say something bad…

I’m stressed…

You need to be put in your place…

You better be invisible…

I’m the boss…

It makes me feel good…

I can make you or break you…

I’ve been good to you in the past…

You are messing up my perceived perfect life…

It’s my world and you’re just living in it…

You won’t stop crying so here’s more…

You dare to dream so here’s a nightmare…

I need to pull you down…

I can’t deal with your positivity…

I feel guilty…

I’m afraid…

You make me feel less than…

You are weak…

I feel weak and need to feel strong…

You’re an embarrassment…

I control you and the situation…

I can’t control the situation…

You will do as I say and think as I think…

You need to love me unconditionally, the good, the bad…

I can’t help it, God made me this way…

I’m broken so I have to break you…

I have heartache that you don’t know about…

I need to make you pay for how I feel…

I am angry about my life…

I am not happy so you should not be happy…

You bring me down…

I feel like a victim so I need to make you the victim…

You are an easy mark…

I have the right…

If you love me, you will take it and forgive me…

I need to be defensive and attack…

I have a good excuse waiting within me…

It’s survival of the fittest…

 

“BECAUSE”… I don’t want to hear because anymore! There is no good excuse for abuse and it is NOT okay.

 

abused broken hearted psalm

“He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3

 

Living with abuse is not an option. It is a nerve-wracking place where you can lose your soul. So, what should the abused or the abuser do to become healthy?

Please, get unbiased professional help, support and be prayerful with the hope that the cycle of abuse stops.

 

May peace and healing be with you,

Maria Lauren

AKA MariaElena Alberici

Your Powerful LIFE blog

My Website

inspirational_quote_maria_elena_alberici_riccio_lauren

Hope and Courage

 Your Powerful LIFE blog is about Living, Inspiration, Fitness, Entertainment…. It is produced in my own time and solely reflects my personal opinions. Statements on this site do not represent the views or policies of my employer, past or present, or any other organization with which I may be affiliated.

 

 

 

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Are you going around in circles?

inspirational_quote_maria_elena_alberici_riccio_lauren

Hope and Courage

“My awareness (to the balance of nature) opens to the creative energy of the universe (directed by God) as I walk into the fulfillment of the future (hope and courage).”

– Maria Elena Alberici, AKA – Maria Lauren

 

Going around in circles is okay if you’re dancing but it’s not fun if you’re just dealing with the everyday stuff of life!

I find that when I have one foot in the past and one foot in the future, my functioning in the present is all out of sync. Thinking as a singer/musician, it’s impossible to perform a jazz song, if your head is doing rock-n-roll.

Life has a rhythm and every day the song is different. Being aware of your breathing and the beating of your heart can give you a clue to the song that you are living. If you don’t like the song, then change the channel or stop to reboot.

 

Take a break…

Do something positive that will put a smile on your face. Read something motivational, maybe a devotional or you can journal, meditate, pray, listen to music or an inspirational podcast.  Relax-n-Renew is a good resource of mini Guided Imagery with soothing music. It’s like taking a mini vacation! 🙂

Starting my morning with a heart of gratitude always makes me feel better. I also like to do some kind of stretching or exercise to warm up my body while being in a prayerful state of thanksgiving.

Of course, there are those mornings, like today! You see, yesterday I varied my workout, a good thing to do, but today my body is screaming at me. Uhg! 😦 To get the kinks out, I stretch on my incline board/slant board where I start with very slow and mindful movements. 

I enjoy doing different forms of exercise and if I can do it outdoors, even better. At the beach, the air is so delectable! It’s a great place to do Yoga or Tai Chi with the focus on deep breathing meditation.

“Inhale new energy; exhale old energy.”

 

The Wheel…

maria_elena_alberici_yoga_fleibility_ strength_the_wheel

On the theme of going around in circles. The yoga pose called, The Wheel, is a challenge that keeps my core flexible and my limbs strong. Being 66 years on this earth, I use this move as part of my mental youth meter.

The Wheel used to be easy for me until two years ago, when I fractured my arm in two places. Since then, I have been slowly easing myself into this posture. 

yoga-powerful-life

Integrated Learning Strategies http://www.ilslearning.com/

To train my body for The Wheel, I do the same stretch with the support of a big ball.

The Yoga pose, Cobra also helps to stretch my abdominal and back muscles while The Plank pose helps strengthen my arms and core for this feat. 

Starting with the month of October is the arrival of Halloween and consecutive months of holiday celebrations which could be fun and stressful. I am getting a jump-start to keep the months ahead balanced and healthy. As I center my whole being on my breath, strength and resiliency, the distractions and worries of life no longer affect my nerve center in a negative way. I am grateful for the moment.

 

Final thoughts…

When I’m driving through life and I ignore my body’s speed limit and the environmental conditions, I may get stuck in the mud. My wheels go round and round, splattering mud everywhere but going nowhere. That’s when I need help to get back on the road of life.

Thank God for my circle of family and friends, especially those who hold me up in prayer.

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“The circle of well-being balances strength and flexibility supported by a circle of family, friends and prayers.”

– Maria Elena Alberici, AKA Maria Lauren

 

Do you have a circle of prayers around you and your loved ones?

Wishing you peace,

Maria Lauren, AKA Maria Elena Alberici

Your Powerful LIFE blog

My Website

You Got The Power

Maria_Lauren_fitness_coach_Maria_Elena_Alberici

Your Powerful LIFE blog is about Living, Inspiration, Fitness, Entertainment…. It is produced in my own time and solely reflects my personal opinions. Statements on this site do not represent the views or policies of my employer, past or present, or any other organization with which I may be affiliated.